How to be a better parent takes 10 steps ! Here they are :

1. Pay attention to what your child tells you. Make eye contact. Ask questions, show your interest in what he shares with you. Just like you don’t appreciate when your child keeps playing and doesn’t look at you when you tell him something important, respect him when he’s the one who talks. Take that time.

2. Play with your child. You’ll learn a lot about your child by playing with him and he’ll learn about you too.

3. Explain why you are the one who settle the rules and why they exist. Tell your child that they are made out of love, because you know what is good for him. When he’ll be an adult, he’ll make his own rules in his house. Make him understand that a family with rules means parents care for children.

4. Kiss, cuddle, tickle, hug ! Having physical contact with your child is important because it makes him feel secure and loved and safe. How to be a better parent is also about showing our love and never let the daily routine take away from us the tender moments we should spend with our kids.

5. Explain your decisions and reactions. What is obvious to you isn’t always obvious for your child. Talk to him, answer his questions and explain the reasons of the punishments you give him. A child who doesn’t understand why he’s punished will never change his behaviour. Always keep that in mind. Children accept things more when they understand them.

6. Be consistent in the interest you have for your child’s life. Don’t stop asking him questions about his day, his friends, the things he’s interested in. It can be a bit frustrating if your child is a teenager and just says “It was ok” but don’t give up, it’ll pay off eventually.

7. Share some things about you with your child, things that can teach him values, or help him in one way or another. Talk about your childhood, your point of view as a child on the rules in your family for example. Kids love stories about their parents’ childhood, they feel more understood. Knowing about the mistakes you made or the things that were difficult for you back then can help your child dealing with his own failures. Don’t make things up of course, just tell real stories about you.

8. Praise your child in everything he does or try to do. Always put your trust in him and show your unconditional support.

9. Be sure that your child never feels guilty or bad about feeling sad, angry, frustrated… All these feelings are normal and you need to make your child aware of this. He’ll be more inclined to express them to you.

10. Sustain your child’s curiosity. Try to know what he’s interested in and even if you’re not crazy about his hobby, show some interest, buy him something related to it. Be here no matter what he likes, what he becomes. This is how to be a better parent.

Strengthening the bond between you and your child takes patience and consistence and of course a few changes in your way of communicating with him. If the situation with your child is difficult for a long time and that things are not under your control anymore, applying a parenting program can definitely help you. There’s no shame in getting parenting help. We’re not born parents ! How to be a better parent is all about being there, paying attention to our words and taking the time to talk and listen to our precious ones.